right now i want to tear down the walls. i want to rip fully grown trees out of the earth. i am so sad, frustrated, angry. i am every emotion and constantly burning eyelids. i am grieving for a dear friend’s lost son. i never knew him, but i can feel her pain and have been all evening. i can’t believe it, yet, i knew it as soon as i heard the question, did i hear?
no. i hadn’t heard.
eric didn’t tell me. he was afraid to give me bad news. he didn’t know when it would be a good time.
so instead of hearing it from him, when he was with me and could hold my hand, i got to hear it on a cell phone, when i was alone at work, after everyone has gone home, and then walk out to the parking lot alone and drive home alone.
the world can be a lonely place, even if you have family and friends who love you.