i realized, shortly before i turned 30, that it wasn’t a good idea to keep waiting for my life to begin. for example – i would constantly fantasize about the things i would do when i was out of debt (turns out i would turn around and get right back IN debt, will ya lookit that). i would dream about having the fashionable clothes i wanted when i got thin.
on and on.
and it’s not that i’m necessarily lacking anything. or that i ever was.
but i still find myself saying things like this. when i have my own place, i will cook dinner every night. when i am thin, i will finally wear the clothes i like. when i am out of debt, i will be able to travel a little.
what about now? how about now? i’m a creative person. i need to find a way to scratch these itches now.
this is my life. i only get one.