no stuffing.

well, the easter dinner with my parents and sister and katie has turned into a party. so, hey you, all of my nashville friends – you are invited, unless you already have plans.

i called dad today, and he wanted to know if i had started buying supplies yet. a month before the party. after i let him down by telling him that, no, i had not bought charcoal yet, i decided to break the news.

"you know dad, katie wants to bring stuffing."

"stuffing? with ham?! that’s just wrong. that’s just… it’s out of season! it’s the wrong seasonings! stuffing is all sage and sage doesn’t go with ham! cloves go with ham! stuffing is like, anti-ham!

…are you transcribing this?"

i was, indeed, typing katie an email explaining the situation. she immediately replied with one word: what.

my response:

i tried to tell you, we just don’t eat stuffing with ham. turkey? porkchops? yes. ham? no.
i say bring it though. except i told him i would talk you out of it.

but bring the pain.

i was able to calm dad down eventually. i had to explain that i was going to give people the option to bring a dish, so he had to start bracing himself now for the possibility that someone might bring a dish that doesn’t go with ham. he just said, "not everyone shares your deep culinary background, amy. you must not judge them. you must have patience."

i called him on it. "you’re trying to get transcribed now, aren’t you?"

his response?

"i gotta go. i’m knitting!"


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